Titanium Camp Table Mounts to Spike, Sticks, or Tripods: Schwarze Biene Big Mama Review

There are many hills I’m game to die on. Few are farther from the grace of both car campers and ultralighters as this one: For camping and backpacking, tables are usually more useful than chairs.

To the former group, to cut either is to have an unfinished camp. To many of the latter, the extra ounces of a table are outright unconscionable. Yet, while there are plenty of places to sit — rocks, stumps, foam pads, hammocks, etc. — tables are harder to come by. Finding a dry, relatively level, fire-resistant, wind-shielded space to place things and store gear can be a tall order.

So, when I saw the Schwarze Biene Big Mama Table, its versatility jumped out at me. It’s levelable, lightweight, modular, strippable, imminently stowable, and even fireproof. I couldn’t help but think of all the applications for camping and backpacking.

I got my hands on one and started testing.

In short: The Big Mama is smaller and tippier than most camp tables under heavy loads. However, it punches above its weight class. Being aluminum, it’s fireproof and cools quickly. It can be outfitted with accessories, weighs roughly 1 pound, and collapses to a self-contained package barely larger than a small cutting board. Some additional accessories even make it possible to make the table both lighter and more functional.

Schwarze Biene Big Mama Camp Table Review

Overview

Most backpacking tables have perennial problems. The common folding aluminum tube legs and mesh tabletop designs are bulky when stored. They can also be finicky to level.

The Big Mama tackles most of these problems with a simple design: The base is one big multisection aluminum ground spike. The table is an aluminum slab that screws onto it. Its perforated holes make a convenient place to stow slim utensils or items that can be hung from them with a carabiner.

With the 8 x 8-inch tabletop and the three-section support pole (22.83 inches in length), the Big Mama weighs just 10 ounces. It’s over $86 straight from the German manufacturer or just under $100 from U.S.-based Hammock Gear, with shorter shipping times (when it’s in stock). All in all, it’s competitively priced and extremely lightweight.

At 8 x 8 inches, the actual surface area is a little underwhelming for the name. It’s big enough for one person to eat over, and that’s it. It’s barely big enough for two people to play a card game on. A regular-sized novel would take up most of its surface area. But the Big Mama boasts a whole suite of accessories that cleverly offset its lack of surface area.

That ecosystem, however, begs the question of how much the table’s value depends on the utility of all the extra gadgets.

Big Mama Accessory Ecosystem

The Woody 

If you don’t want to bring the Big Mama’s support pole, you can use the “Woody” accessory. This attachment allows you to affix the Big Mama to a wooden stick instead, saving you an extra few ounces in your pack.

The Woody is also great for photographers, as it can be mounted on top of a tripod. That’s very useful for camera-toting woods walkers like me. It makes setting up a level table in rocky, uneven terrain a cinch. 

It also saves a few ounces in my pack, as the tripod was coming along anyway. All I need to bring is the tabletop and the Woody.

If you’re not the photographer type, Schwarze Biene also offers its own lightweight tripod base — a great addition for soft ground, but one that can still require some finagling for a level surface. 

With the Woody, that’s another 1.9 ounces and roughly $33-40 (depending on whether you buy from the manufacturer or Hammock Gear). Add the tripod, another 5.1 ounces and around $42-50, and your table starts to become both bulky and expensive.  

Big Baggy

Given the Big Mama’s small size, the Big Baggy helps increase its storage capability. It’s essentially a polyamide sack that hangs beneath the table, more than doubling its total storage space. A small grommeted hole in the bottom allows the ground spike to thread through it so it hangs straight down.

In addition to being a catch-all pocket off the ground, this is a particularly useful accessory for winter camping. In cold weather, I’ve never been comfortable sleeping with my water in my sleeping bag. I’ve had too many leaky Nalgenes for that. The Big Baggy gives me the option to wrap a puffy around a Nalgene or two and shove them in the Big Baggy.

For hot tenting, in particular, I’m looking forward to having a pocket I can set up right next to the wood stove. So, for me, the extra $45 for the Big Baggy is worth it. Plus, the weight penalty is negligible at 3.4 ounces.

Universal Holder

I got stranded on an island in Lake Powell for a night after high winds turned my kayak into a kite. Sitting on a beach, next to a smashed-up boat, and nursing a newfound need to distract myself from the sand stinging my eyes, I found plenty of use for the Universal Holder. Technically, it’s a multipurpose organizer attachment. For me, it was the best tent theater I could ask for from inside my tent.

The holder also offers a row of tooth-like cutouts that are ideal for hanging utensils, hats, glove loops, or other small items. I found it to be a very useful addition to the Big Mama. Nevertheless, the Universal Holder is another $22 and 2.4 ounces.

Quick price check: What was a pretty competitive $86 table, with the addition of the Universal Holder, Woody, and Baggy, is now around $186 and 18 ounces, with no additional sections, tripod legs, etc. Compare that to the Helinox Table One. The Big Mama is around $46 more and only 4 ounces lighter, to say nothing of stacking it up against the similar $35 NatureHike table. 

Cooking With Fire

While Schwarze Biene told GearJunkie that while it does not recommend cooking with the Big Mama, it is fireproof. There are no plastic or rubber elements that can be melted. If you pull a hot pan or mug off the fire, you can place it directly on the tabletop. You could also place a gas or alcohol stove directly on top and cook from there.

Schwarze Biene said that the Big Mama table is not food-safe, so users should avoid using it as a grilling surface. However, if you were in a survival pinch and really needed to throw this thing over an open flame and cook on it, it’s possible — just not recommended.

Big Mama in the Field 

What makes or breaks a good camp table? To this organization-obsessed mind, it comes down to stowability, storage, stability, strength, and simplicity. 

On the first point, the Big Mama is easily the most stowable table I’ve ever used. The 8 x 8–inch plate, with as many pole sections as you could practically use, easily folds away into a flat package within the Big Baggy. At 8 x 8 x 3 inches, it takes up about as much space in a pack as a thick envelope.

Storage is a mixed bag. Fully kitted out, it holds about as much as your more common Helinox and NatureHike-style tables, for a cost. By itself, it’s a much more minimalistic platform — more appropriate for ultralight gear users.

Stability is a bit dependent. In good soil, the table will comfortably handle 10-20 pounds, depending on how deep you drive the spike. It wouldn’t be my first choice for heavy cooksets. Load it lopsided (like hanging a heavy pair of boots off one side or setting a cast iron pan off-kilter), and it’ll twist and lean. 

However, with the Woody allowing you to use a tripod or a sharp stick as a base, you can effectively make stability a non-issue for most camping tasks. Rough and rocky terrain can still be a pain, but arguably less so than with folding tables on uneven ground.

Durability-wise, it’s hard to beat a simple slab of aluminum. Drop it — it’s fine. Break a pole section — get a new one, or use the Woody to turn a stick into your base.

For simplicity, what more could you want? It’s a slab that screws onto a stick. 

Schwarze Biene Big Mama: Who Is It For?

Schwarze Biene’s Big Mama Table is a versatile and durable piece of gear. Its light weight and its small size makes it an easy companion on all kinds of different adventures. Its versatility is somewhat bound to its host of accessories, but even in its simplest form, it’s a useful piece of camp kit.

Who is it for? Just about anyone who uses the backcountry, or carries gear on their back or on a bike.

Ultralighters will either hate the idea of bringing a table outright or love the Big Mama in its plainest (read: lightest) iteration. At 10 ounces, it’s just light enough to make the ultralight cut.

Hammock campers will likely love this table. With its extra ground spike segment, it’s tall enough to be a hammock-side table. With the Big Baggy (to indulge the obsession with keeping everything off the ground) and the Universal holder for watching the odd downloaded movie on a phone, it’s a useful hammock camping accomplice.

Bikepackers and hot tenters will also love it in just about any configuration. It easily fits in tiny bikepacking bags. At camp, it provides a place to store water bottles and socks next to the stove and off the frozen ground.

For car camping or paddling, where space is less of a concern, there are beefier options that offer more bang for your buck.

For me personally, the unparalleled versatility and minimal form factor have easily made the Big Mama one of my new favorite camp luxuries. Even when the chair stays at home, Schwarze Biene has a place at my table.